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Breaking the Cycle by ULRIKE

11/11/2013

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Habits and behaviors are hard to break. Being taught since childhood that we have to confirm to certain standards has made us automatons rather than individuals. Parents and teachers, coaches, religious guides and anyone that we’ve ever came into contact with have left an imprint on our subconscious mind. Deep down we have accepted the rules of society. We thought we were ‘good’ if we conformed to the mind-sets of others. In order to change your perception of who you are to who you want to be, you must first create a clear picture of your ideal self. Then, and only then, can you slowly change your perception of yourself, hence your image and likeness.


Well, the truth is that we are naturally equipped to unfold from within and that all knowledge is already stored in this vast ocean of consciousness. We do not need the outside perceptions to show us the way. In a matter of fact these
outside roadmaps all lead to the same place: misery, illness, unhappiness – an inharmonious life.

In society’s view, a ‘good’ little girl must grow up to be sweet, nurturing and loving. She must be there for the family 24/7, bare children and provide the husband with a good home. She must be the caretaker and the one that holds the family unit together. Unfortunately, women also have to work fulltime and provide additional income to be able to pay bills and to live comfortably.

On the other hand, a ‘good’ little boy must grow up to be a strong man that can support the family; become the protector and a leader. He must be in charge at all times. You think this sounds like the old days? Think again. It is a
stereotype still practiced in many homes. Yet, in larger cities you can finally see a picture that is slowly changing. More shared responsibilities and a general acceptance of role reversal is taking the place of old and outgrown thought patterns. Maybe there is hope?

Pesky demands of our society also include the race for a career and always having to win and to be the best. This encourages competition and also may induce unneeded stress. The stresses of today’s world have promoted alcoholism and addiction of any kind in order to cope. Your habits have strengthened over time. Your behaviors are the actions stemming from those gradually acquired habits. Repetition is the key.

Breaking a habit, or more than one habit, will require diligent work. Repetition, repetition, and repetition again, is necessary to change your innermost thoughts and convictions. Your habits might be those of getting angry easily, yelling and using bad language, maybe you are getting nervous at the first sign of trouble, you are over-eating, over-worked, constantly complaining and overall project a sense of negativity. Are you in the habit of criticizing and judging others? Are you constantly tearing your fellow man down; does he/she not live up to your standards? Look in the mirror. Your self-image reflects what you see in others. You are not alone; however, negativity creates illness and
unpleasant experiences and who doesn’t want to feel good, healthy, appreciated and loved?

How to change your perception of who you are to who you want to be?

We certainly have a picture in mind of who and what we are, maybe a distorted one, but nevertheless an image of who we represent. Our self-worth, self-esteem, self-love, accumulated beliefs during our upbringing and other outside
influences, including our inner belief system, surely shaped us.

So you think you know yourself pretty well? You are generally satisfied with your moods, mind sets, appearance and productivity, and you created a wonderful home for your family. Good for you! What about you on the opposite spectrum? The one that feels he/she always gets the short end of the stick. There is always some roadblock, and you just can’t get a break. You live paycheck to paycheck and just can’t get ahead. Would you like to live better? Of course!

Where and what you are in your life (believe it or not) is not due to outer circumstances, but it is solely the making of your own belief system and thought convictions. It is a complicated structure of accumulated impressions, teachings, mental habits, and most of all beliefs about your ‘self’, over a long period of time. So let’s reiterate that only you can create a new you, only you have the power to change.

Your first step is to know who and what you want to be. Honesty with self is required to accomplish this objective. This takes some diligent thought and sincere soul-searching. I’d say we can all agree that we certainly want health,
wealth and happiness, even though, health, wealth and happiness might have many different meanings to each and every one of us.

So how can you break the cycle? Use those 5 essential steps:
 - Self-observance, through honest soul-searching
- Establish a new mind model of yourself, through finding out who you really want to
be
- Stay focused and determined in changing your thought habits to a
more positive outlook
- Do not doubt that you can accomplish what you
have set out to do and stay on course
- Love yourself and treat yourself
as the wonderful spiritual being you are


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Read more of ULRIKE's articles at the Los Angeles Examiner

11/10/2013

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http://www.examiner.com/mind-and-body-2-in-los-angeles/ulrike-maria-wilson
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